Monday, December 15, 2008

Ugur + Rodie + 2 Hours In The Gardens Traffic

We left the office 5.30 as usual, and headed straight to the Gardens, and he would drop me at the Ibn Batuta Mall so that i can get a cab easier. This has been going on for two months now. And we are more relaxed with our languages now to each other since it's just the two of us in the car (and by saying that, meaning all the vulgarities flying all over the car interior u have to fumigate the car after we got out!!) It was always fun and funny.

But today it was MIND BLOW-ING.
**don't get excited over the word in CAPS could be of bizzilions other meanings - wink**

We started to talk about TV shows - well - he started it by singing 'Smelly Cat' and we laughed like crazy. And we spoke of the scenes and characters that we love and hate from 'Friends'. The difference between the 3 guys & the 3 chics when they were talking about Ross+Rachel's first kiss. Then we moved on to Seinfield, we both love Kramer... then we start reminiscing the younger years when there was 'Cheers'. He mentioned he was in the 'Cheers' bar when he was in the USA a few years back, and i told him i love it so much i even memorised the theme song by heart. He asked me to sing it and spontaneously turned off the radio...

Makin a way in a world today takes everything u got
Takin a break from all your worries surely would helped a lot
Wouldn't u like to get away?
Sometimes u wanna go
Where everybody knows your name
And they always glad u came
U wanna be where u can see
That troubles are all the same
U wanna be where everybody knows your name
U wanna go where people know
That people are all the same
U wanna go where everybody knows your name....

We even sang the last verse together. Had a little Ugur-Rodie moment there (don't kill me y'all!!!)

Then we went back to 'Friends' and we agreed that no matter how many times we watched it we still laughed the same way. And he said the other one that he love to follow was 'Sex & The City'. Oh i said... i thought guys HATE S.A.T.C, laughingly he said yes, that's why he followed it!

And... that was the point where Ugur should change his career to become a public speaking GURU (one with a very SEXAY Turkish accent). I am telling y'all... that man has some phenomenal (that word again) theories!

He told me that the only reason he's following the S.A.T.C is because of 'Big'. according to him, 'Big' should be the role model of all men, on how to deal with the female spiecies. 'Big' is not ruled by anyone, 'Big' came & went as he wished and got Carrie wrapped around his finger, playing her on a string. 'Big' put his woman in the place WHERE THEY SHOULD BE. 'Big' might be in love... but he doesn't give a f***.

Ok maybe some of you never watched the S.A.T.C. Ok move on to his next theory.

To him, when a guy is thinking he is smarter than the female sitting across him, he could be the biggest idiot in the world. Yep... IDIOT was his very word. Why.. u might ask..

Because, if any men should've known better, the female spiecies are the BEST at playing dumb. If a guy thinks that he is smarter and winning, that means that the girl actually manipulate him to think that he is smarter and winning .... so that  he would be totally oblivious when she took 'the driver's seat' ... therefore as a matter of fact-ly, she's actually the winning one!

And according to Ugur, the smartest girl ever - is the girl who knows how to make her man thinks that he is with THE IDEA and THE DECISION... when in fact THE IDEA and THE DECISION are all HERS!!!

Next, he said a guy should carry a pint of blood in his pocket at all times. Because?

When a guy is having a hard on, all the blood in his body went rushing to 'there' (he was actually gesturing towards his 'there'!! i almost passed out!!!) So there will be none left to function the brain. And therefore the man is the most useless creature at this point. A total wreck to mankind. Whatever his actions during this time is all controlled by a woman. He is merely a puppet to be played and abused. So, should the guy carry around a pint of blood in his pocket all the time, he could have immediate blood transfusion. Hence while having a hard-on, there's still be sufficient blood supply for him to function the brain!!!!


Although i still think he's a CHAUVINIST PIG. Big time...

Sunday, December 14, 2008

the philosopher

let me take a friend's smart ass quote and twist it around.

life is complicated as u make it.
life is a bloody drama as u make it.
life is a bitch as u make it.
life is worthless as u make it.

key word - u make it. your choice. your decision to jump. so don't blame the rest of the world that u tried and failed. blame yourself for choosing that path u took. take the downside of your own choice, your own make & your own decision like a MAN. face the consequences. have some f**king balls.

u choose to live a complicated life, hence failed, hey don't bitch about it. don't fret. don't bring the rest of the world down with u. stop bein a f**king whiner. shut-the-f**k-up.

simple huh ... simple my a**!!

Friday, October 24, 2008

How have I been doing?

Maybe it is time to update uols about my on-goings in Dubai.

As everyone knows, my girls already started school, in their second month now, and coping very well (thank God al-mighty) despite the major change. Yes there were a little bit struggling in language & communication with Dania but not so much for Marsya & Alya. And even so, Dania is starting to get popular amongst her classmates, effortlessly, like how she was when we were back home, language barrier or not.

As for me... all of u might think i would be driving myself insane right about now with the office, and the girls and school meetings and homeworks and errands and chores huh...?

As one of my dearest friends said & i quote "Life is as simple as you make it"... and i could never agree more.

All of u may not believe it that at least a couple of nights in a week i would take a couple of hours to chill, or shisha or supper or coffee with some close friends, or have a little window shopping by my self (in which ofcouse i never fail to shop for something pretty & silly), or even sweating at the gym! And so far I haven't missed helping the girls with their homeworks, and i haven't skipped any of the PTA meetings! Supermom huh? Not really.


Yea ok, i have a maid, so all of the cooking and cleaning considered solved. And i noticed a lot of my friends with maids.... maaaan aren't they BUSY dictating the maids! Hovering over them like a hawk!! I mean they are much busier now then they were before they have the maids!

Girls please, the maids are there to help you ease the burden and the stress.... not to add them! And noooooo i don't need anymore stress in my life ... I want to stay young much longer!! Yes yes i had maids before who betrayed me and ran away with the uncle next door, so yea we meet shitty people every now and then, but i do believe a little kindness goes a long long way. So, i just briefed my maid only once, and more than a few times she would ask questions and how to do's, and i treat her kindly, in return she's appreciating it and she looks happy.... therefore so far the girls are so well fed, my home spick and span and voluntarily she would join my girls with artworks, paintings and games. Ofcourse I would join them too and have our many little laughs everytime.

That's a lot of stress lifted. And many wrinkles postponed!

Next, the girls went to bed at 9pm. Hey after 9pm i still can do a lot with myself till my bedtime! But yea i don't overdo it ofcourse, i was never a 'party-mom'. But i like to have my fun. I love a night out once in a while. Real conversation with some educated adults. Meet new interesting people.

And my weekends? I went out every weekend with the girls. Malls usually. Or a close friend's house. And once we went to see live band in Hard Rock Cafe (they wanted to go again!) And some of my dearest friends really didn't mind and even love having them over or join our weekends gatherings. One of my friend told me that 'ur kids can really hang-out with adults' ... She's really bias cos she adores them too much.... but then again my girls are very well behaved so i guess she's being true as well.

And to have a 4 year old girl u might think i have tons to carry yea... coz she actually still a baby...

I learnt to have an easy life. From the time Dania was born, never again i bring the whole household in a huge bag when i am travelling. It will be just a bottle of warm milk, a piece of diaper, a little towel and a pair of pants and blouse should she make a mess. All all these stuffed inside my trendy sling bag, or their fluffy rucksack. Now that Alya is four, these items becoming lesser & lesser! Hey there's public toilets, and there's supermarket everywhere that u can get fresh milk from, thank God for modern amenities!!!! So instead of stressing myself carrying my whole household and worrying and worrying, i usually travel light & easy, and most importantly have as much fun as possible! Isn't that the reason why you have a day out with your children???

Hey making it easy doesn't make u a lesser parent ok?

Monday, October 6, 2008

Told ya..

Remember the blue pet fish that i mentioned? And the little grave in the flower pot? And its little tombstone made of eraser?

Like some of you, i couldn't believe that my ex-colleagues still kept it there. Although the bamboo plant in the pot not looking as nice as before, the little grave still in place.

So there it is, for you to see.

Therefore i would like to thank all my ex-colleagues back in KL, for keeping the memories of US alive.

Love u too.

Why so MEAN???

Do you actually want people to dislike you?

Bitch about you?

Curse you?

Why do you have to be mean and bad when you actually know that you are being mean and bad?

Do you enjoy being a bitch?

Do you enjoy hurting people's feelings?

Do you love it when people despise you?

Do you feel big about it? Grand? Great?

Why are you creating unnecessary stress?

Why do you feel that you need to be difficult?

You feel you are loosing if you are not?

Isn't being patience and calm & collected & humble & sincere & kind is the nicest thing you could do to yourself?

Is that not the right track to be on?

Don't you know you that are big & winning by practicing these values?

Why do you want to bring yourself as low as the other angry person opposite you?

Do you love to look stupid?

Do you love to embarass yourself?

Whatever your response to my questions, you know actually the truth. Only you are not admitting it.

I beg you just let yourself think & ponder.

And maybe later you can be your better self...

Wednesday, September 10, 2008


I found it. Finally i got something to write today.

This is about my struggle to find my SELF ESTEEM.

I must tell uols being brought up as a Malay, i was somewhat a very shy girl. (I still am a very shy girl - naaahh). I guessed we Malays always have these qualities in us. Polite, humble, reserved, introvert and shy, in all sorts of different ratios. Well not all Malays, but yea the typical Malays. At least the ones born during my time.

So being a shy girl, i always held myself back from doing whatever i really wanted to do. Inside i am a very outspoken, loud and a hyper girl. I was quite miserable actually i must say, for if in some occassions i leapt or squelled, somebody would just shhhhh me.

Then it became more complicated for me as i became a teenager. Everything was becoming more awkward. And i was sent to a boarding school. And let me tell uols the strict rules there made it worse for me. I want to jump and scream and sing and be silly... but noooo that's not the proper way.... There were always be teachers or wardens or seniors who would glare. Even my dormates & classmates! And i tell uols the boys..... they were mean!!! They would picked on what you were wearing, would always made you feel that you were not decent enough... ughhhh!!! And secretly i had established that school years was the worst episode of my life.

There's another thing about me as an awkward teenager.

My teeth.

They were UGLY! I mean they were all over the place!!! I have an extra tooth in the middle, and k-9s stickin out everywhere, all were crooked and not alligned.... oooh how i felt so un-attractive!! Imagine i was laughing & smiling with a hand upon my mouth all the time!

And so one time i made the silliest move. I told a friend i had a crush on one of the boys. And this friend (nooooot anymore) told another friend, who told another friend, and soon it reached THE BOY. The lively me was excited actually and my heart gave a little leap, but the (had to be) shy & (had to be) reserved me was sooooo embarassed!!!!!!!! Conflicts huh?

That was not enough.

THE BOY who i hoped to love and be loved by was pissed instead. He was annoyed that the girl who were having a crush on him was little me with the ugly teeth. Not that he ever said it directly, but there's one time he dedicated an Eid card to the girls in my class (there were only 9 of us) and left a comment about each of us, and ofcourse ( i still remember his exact words) he said something offensive about my smile. He said i smile like a stinky cockle... (".....tersengih macam kerang busuk..... Told uols the boys were MEAN). I know it wasn't actually offending the ugly teeth, BUT, i was a confused awkward teenager at the time and very very very sensitive about comments concerning 'smile'... 'teeth'... 'mouth'........... Quickly i went back hiding into my little nook. And sadly i walked to the class everyday with my head held down.

...Must be the teeth! What else could it be?.... I always feel that i am a very plain girl, but with those bad teeth, hey i was actually an ugly girl!! Sad huh? Yea i was sad for 5 miserable years.

Soon i left school, went to college, met my first love there (he'll be on the next blog... ok watch out...), who convinced me that i am the prettiest girl in college, however i was secretly convinced that it was actually the boobs factor... and soon the ugly teeth was not an issue anymore. After 3 years together we broke up, i was crushed, sad and angry. Again the teeth was there to be blamed. Silly me never thought that i am pretty enough for handsome him (and he got really really pretty teeth!!!!! Beautiful smile.... Nice lips... Errrr... eheh.. let's not go there..) Even one of his sisters was makin fun of the teeth once. (What a bitch)... After i graduated from college i quickly secured a job, made a point to gather some money especially to get my pearly whites braced & fixed. The braces was a tough and challenging 18 months period.

But my oh my how my life changed after that. I laughed more, i smiled all the time, i naturally felt i stood out in a crowd, i became heart of the party, i dared to ask guys out on dates, i walked with my chin up, and i was finally enjoying my feminine sexuality!!! I became my very true sanguine self!!! And even though in my society people still 'glaring', i didn't see them anymore. They ceased to exist. My confidence level was soaring high! I feel i can talk to just anyone & can do almost anything! (Yea yea yea there's the boobs factor too...)

I finally found my SELF ESTEEM. By fixing my ugly teeth.

A lot of my close friends felt the same way as uols do...

They don't get it....!

Monday, September 8, 2008

A Special Birthday Wish..

A guy who is very near & dear to me celebrated his (ahem)th birthday today.

He just moved to Bahrain, trying to look for himself, like i do... and ofcourse he got plenty of time to do that than some of older us... So i would like to wish him luck, health, and most of all HAPPINNESS.

Coz i bet my gorgeous a** that's exactly what all of us are looking for.


Sunday, September 7, 2008

Me @ Motherhood (Sigh...)

Last night the whole occupants of apartment 402 came into huge panic...

They came running down from the roof top pool only minutes after they left. I thought wow that was quick, but the pale face of my maid alerted me that something was wrong. "...Alya was jumping in the pool and knocked her chin on the pool's edge..." she said. I asked her how serious it was... She said it was bleeding and she dare not look at the wound. Ok, so I know I have got to have to check this one out. I went to her bedroom, she was crying and clutching her chin. Marsya & Dania stood frozen at their 'spots', also pale-faced. I was already panicking but being the 'man' of the house... Couldn't let them know that  I was almost having a black-out, could I?

I knelt down and took her hand away from her chin... My heart sank to the bottom of my stomach... There's an open wound looking like a little mouth at the underside of her chin. And my instant facial reaction set Marsya & Dania to tears.

My hands & feet starting to feel cold. But somehow I calmed down, so that I was able to use my brain. So firstly i called Othman, who was out for tarawikh. Next i called Buck, i need to know where's the nearest clinic... Not much help there, and I remembered Ugur. He gave me a precise direction on how to get there. Most of all of you had already known what a scatterbrained creature I am, but having to play the survivor game in Dubai, I learnt to remember directions and memorize a lot of stuff that I took a lot for granted before.

So we went to the clinic. I guessed panic was written all over my face that the doctor tried to calm me down a little bit. Numerously he repeated 'there's nothing to worry about'. At this point in time Alya already stopped crying. Too tired probably. So they started to stitch the wound up. Ooooh and how I again playing the hero role right, bravely stayed and watched the whole procedure!!! A few times I felt nauseous  and almost passed out. Really! But Alya kept on glancing my way, for some moral support for sure, so I tried to soothe her with smiles and encouraging words. To her if this world suddenly become completely dark, but if mama was there, she will be fine. I know that for a fact. And she is such a brave baby too. The whole time they were sewing her up, not a single tears!!! My heart glows for her...

She stepped down from the treatment bed, and instantly I received that warm soft familiar baby's hug.

So u see... already 3 kids, but I still don't have a clue of how to be a mom. I take it as it comes. I handle it as it happens. No plans. No strategies. And those books telling you how to be a good excellent mom? I know they are really good reads, but i don't think i can rely on those to guide me through this life long responsibility that was blessed upon me.

I am not the best mom. Hey I probably am not a good mom even. But I know I am trying my best beyond my ways to be a mom for them. No matter what kind of critisism I am getting from left right and centre, no matter if I myself not sure I am doing it right, I know I am doing it MY BEST.

Those random kisses I am always getting from them proved it alright.


A huge word for me. Gigantic. I wonder if I could ever fit in it.

Sunday, August 31, 2008


Do i miss Malaysia? Ofcourse i do. And to realise that in Dubai people start to look up to us whose coming from this beautiful small warm country, it really makes my heart soar high.

Today I'd love to wish my country the HAPPIEST 51st BIRTHDAY. May u prosper, stay peaceful, be more colorful, and continue making our hearts SOAR!!

So proud of you.

(Gee... i got goosebumps now...)

Saturday, August 30, 2008


Has it been a month yet since i last said the word? Ok so it's fine to say it again.

Heh heh.

This is a pic of my baby & Muna's baby. Playing together at long last.

But this is not the real story.

Ok focus at the TV screen please. At the Arabic words at the bottom. Noticed anything soooo fimiliar? The 'DOUBLES'?

Definitely a sign.

And judging from the double smiles... definitely a good sign.

Case no. 2

Ok there's this guy.

I always think that he is pretty cool. Funny, in a sinycal way. So i hang out with him sometimes.

Come July and the apartment hunting begun. He was suggesting that I should find a 3 bedrooms apartment. Same story, he want to rent out one bedroom, but he is willing pay 60k a year, coz he's bringing the wife and the 2 kids. Plus my maid will have to take care of the kids too. Well he's not getting the bigger room with that sort of cash, i thought. Some of uols in KL might think - wow, she's becoming a bitch... But come on, 3 decent bedrooms in Dubai will cost from 175k + 10% deposit & commission. If i am getting a loan from the bank, that will add another 9% minimum. Bringing the maid in, i have to pay the immigration 10k, and her flight ticket cost me another 3k, and also her medical check-up fees, plus i have to raise her salary almost double according to Dubai law.

So... what bitch?

Like case no. 1, i just proceed. Nothing committed yet. But he was little bit more helpful (yea right). He emailed me a few apartments adverts in Barsha to view.

Yea ok. How the hell am i going there? How am i getting the money to pay for it? Applying for D.E.W.A (that's electricity & water supply). Hey i spend a whole stressful day at the D.E.W.A office yea... and TV channel, drinking water supply, appliances, furniture...... the list went on & on! He don't give a 'F'. Didn't even offer to share a single cab ride with me. At least pretend like u care yea, and fix a date to go view the apartments together. NOTHING! By the end of the day he would just ask 'hey did u get that apartment?' And another brilllllliiiiiaaant idea may i add, he told me ' family only coming in September yea, so i will only start moving in September'. So if i m moving in August, i have to bear the bloody expensive month by myself. How bloody convinient!!!


When i finally moved, he seemed to be ok with it. Didn't show any attitude. Yea ok good, u have problems, i also have problems. So let's solve our problems ourselves.

But there's the thing about 'using' my maid to take care of his 2 kids. He brought it up, saying he would pay me for the baby sitting job. Ok fine. But i am not the one who's baby sitting here. My maid is. So we need to ask her. She arrived (not an easy trip for her too...) and to be fair to this guy and she, i popped the question. Ofcourse she was reluctant. Who wouldn't? More money or not. We are talking about 5 children here, cramping my small house. And houseworks, cooking, etc. She told me she can't cope with that. Then i broke the bad news to him. Oh! Was he upset! He said i should have told him this earlier, for he wouldn't have brought his family here if he knows MY MAID WOUDN'T TAKE CARE OF HIS KIDS. So the decision of him being together with his family in Dubai, depends on my maid's availability...

What? What??? WHAAATTTT??????????

You see, the way he was putting it, i am responsible of his baby sitting issues... Don't care how hard for me to bring the maid here, how much money & stress spent, hey don't even care if the babies were not popping out from me!!! (Okay too graphic here... Sorry bout that...) Am i suppose to work my life around THE REST OF THE WORLD'S PROBLEMS HERE????????

So uols, i'd really like to help, but help yourself first. Have some strong backbones. If u don't have any, start working on it. Do some out-sourcing, research, homework. Browse the internet. Self educate. Ask around. Make more friends outside your circle. Do it yourself. Get favours only when you are being offered some. That is all that i have been doing all this while. Don't take your friends for granted. You might loose them sooner. Or get deleted from facebook. Or blocked from MSN.

I am a small girl... there's only a limited weight i can take on my shoulder.

Thank you for understanding.



I know a few of my 'fans' already getting upset with me for not updating this blog as frequent as i should... I'd love to write everyday, but hey, i m a mother of 3 yea... that's really hard work!

Ok let me take a ciggy break and think of something entertaining to write.

Patience fans dearest...

Ok today i'm gonna bitch. Really guys, there's only up to certain limits little nice me can take yea...

Case no. 1

This girl. She's a not-so-close friend from back home. But since there are not so many of us here in Dubai, yea ok we should stick to one another. Help out each other so to speak.

So I was busy looking for an apartment in July, and suddenly she came into picture. She was suggesting that we should live together, that she would rent one of the bedrooms in my future apartment. She told me she can't pay much, yea ok, i am willing to accept less than market price. She's driving a company's car, so at least i can get a ride to work or at least to the supermarket anytime, therefore i told her that if we want to realise this plan, she should help me look for a place that costs not more than 150k a year, coz if she is paying 36k a year, then the balance is affordable for me to bear, although by now uols must be saying 'isn't that even fair?'... Yea i know, but if i choose to, i can be THAT kind. Really.

So days & weeks passed. I was struggling applying loans and bugging dear Buck during a few weekend and taking expensive taxi rides to view some potiential apartments yea... And guess what she was doing? Absolutef******ly nuttin'. Not even offering me a ride, not even looking up the many apartments' advertisements... NOTHING!! I didn't even want to ask for favours from her... I just proceed, whatever i can find, whatever i can manage, i will take it as it comes. Qe sera sera - that never change...

Then i somehow managed a loan, and i found this apartment. A sweet new friend helped me to furnish it, even helped fixing some furniture.. (God bless you... thank you so much.. love the orchid..) It happenned so quick actually though, as how Dubai is - fast & furious. In less than two weeks the place is looking like a real home already. (praise God Almighty for making it happenned for me).

Suddenly, i got a phonecall. From her. How are you... bla-bla-bla... i moved.. and.... What do you know... She said, '.... so we are not living together like we planned before???'

We planned??? WE??? PLANNED??

Too much! And imagine. Her brilliant idea was, to move in ONLY when she got a new job, which is only God knows when! And even on that matter, she was relying on me to help her with the job hunting!!!!! Hey, am i looking like her bloody keeper here??? Is it conviniently stamped on my forehead but i couldn't see?? PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTT!!!!!! (see i totally know how to use the "pfft" now).

Too upset to continue with case no. 2.

Need another ciggy break.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

The J.R. Story

Kate was paying a pre-housewarming visit to my place, for the first time last week.

She insisted that she bought us something, and since i raved about J.R, my new fighter fish pet, she thought it's a nice idea that we get him a mate (now i am very sure he's a he-fish, cos we asked the nice boys from the pet shop... a.k.a the petshop boys - west-end-boys... side tracking..... )

Anyways, she bought this lovely she-fish, maroon-purple colour, and named her K.J (well K.J - J.R... it rhymes).

We dumped K.J into J.R's bowl, hoping that they would mate and make beautiful blue-purple babies together, although i feared that they soon gonna fight each other to death, different sex or not. However, at first, they looked ok, checking each others out... no aggressions... so we left them alone and had our dinner.

Suddenly we realised there's a commotion in the fish bowl... We thought they were fighting, or having rough sex yea... but nooooo..... J.R suddenly became so nervous, jumping about, and he ALMOST TURNED WHITE!!!! To save him, i quickly took out K.J and put her in a jar.

Pffffffffftt so much for the babies hope...

What a looser.

Men. sigh...

The Fishy Story

He's pur-tee isn't he?

We named him 'Fishy'. Well i named him Fishy. Everyone else got no choice but to agree, ofcourse.

U see this is a fighter fish. Maybe from the guppies family, i am not sure, just a little bit of some fish education here... They don't live with other fish. A totaly solitaire creature. If they bumped into another fish of the same size or the same sex, may it be from the same species or not, they will fight it. TILL DEATH. TILL THEIR OWN DEATH that is.

Hence, the name - FIGHTER FISH.

So my usual quality time with him was just poking his bowl so that he will 'fight' with the vision of my finger. Sort of training. Just to keep his juices flowing. Believe it or not.. the more fierce he became, the more vibrant his colour would be. Pleasant way to keep me awake during those boring dry moments in the office. Oh did i tell u that we had him kept in the office?

Meet this guy. Ugly plush-toy from Mc Donalds. If any of uols ever seen the movie 'Brother Bear' u would know this silly bugger.

Why are we suddenly switching characters? Aha... because they linked to each other..

So i have this toy, always sitting at the edge of my computer screen...

One day i decided that i wanted to play with both.

Took the toy, and humming the 'JAWS' theme song, start to tease Fishy with it... and oh my God how he got spooked!!!!! He almost jumped out from the bowl!!! And the magnificent blue colour... FADED! I promise u he almost turned white!!!!

(Proved my point earlier that this is really an ugly toy).

A couple of weeks later, he died. The whole office cried a bit, was depressed for a whole day... And they were lookin at me in a blaming sort of way... (And i took it like a chick.) I was the most depressed one there.

So i carved a tombstone from a white eraser, wrote on it 'here lies FISHY. R.I.P'. And Daniel wrapped him up in tissue papers, and we had a little funeral at the flower pot next to Meiling's cubicle. (Pause - sad)

When Jeremy (my sweetest ex-boss) came back from vacation a few days after that, he passed by the flower pot then reverse geared... and asked me 'hey... who died?'

(Wish i have a pic of his cute grave to share here)...

I just realised!

He's a she fish!!!!!!


Thursday, August 14, 2008

Not my lover.. but more than a friend..

To Ajax... Updating... updating...

(Pffft some of uols have no patience at all!)

I was chatting with a darling friend last night (yes while i was chatting with u too Ajax.. see i am so multiple tasking... ;-) and u are a darling friend too ok, just got upgraded about 2 secs ago..)

Yea back to my darling friend, we used to work in the same office. About 6 months ago we went seperate ways. He Guangzhou, me Dubai.

So last night we were on webcam. No-no.. not the cybersex bit.. Huh uols think i would expose myself to uols that much? THINK AGAIN! I was just merely showing him my new empty apartment. Oh i forgot to update uols that i finally moved out from Kate's! To a very cozy 2 bedrooms apartment in Dubai Marina. Nice view... well if u stand at some certain angle, yea u can see some impressive waterfront view... And a lot of sun too. And already i bumped into some hot looking opposite sex during my many elevator trips... Yea i am definitely gonna have some good fun here. Err... i mean... u know... it's always nicer to borrow sugar from a cute neighbour than just a neighbour. Or help looking at my plumbing... (is that how uols call it nowadays? heh heh..)

Why are we talking about sex.. err.. i mean my neighbours here? The star of this blog should be my darling friend yea. Sorry. I am such a scatter-brained creature, but uols know that already...

Back to the webcam part. I was having nice spagetti bolognaise extravaganza a-la rodie, and he was.. hey i don't know what he was doing actually.. (blurr face).. erm oh he was not on webcam. However the same night, i got myself a new pet. It's a blue fighter fish. Fierce little guy... So as we were talking about the happennings in my life, i showed this fish to him. We squeeled and shrieked on msn, like little bitches. You see in 2003 we had the very same coloured fighter fish in our office and ofcourse, fishes don't have long life span yea... so it died (oh i have another story about this fish too!!!! next blog..) We were so excited that (he said and i quote) i found an Arab version of the very same fighter fish!! Oh and named him J.R. Handsome name for a handsome fish.

So out of all these excitement, he decided that we should celebrate.

How u think?

He sent me a song. Titled 'Goyang-goyang' - means shake-shake. The unique part of it is, the song tittle is in Malay, but the song is in Tamil, and he is a Chinese!!!! And the rythm... Maaann how we got really excited! Always! Squeeling & shrieking (on msn still) like bithces.. Again!!! When i finished downloading the song we played the song together and how we went goyang-goyang!!! And let me tell ya that was THE MOST EXCITING EVENT OF MY WEEK!!!!

So, the subtance of the whole story is, only this kind of deep friendship would enjoy this kind of unforgetable meaningful moments.

Uols agree??

Wednesday, July 30, 2008


I forgot to mention this tiny detail..

Some of you sharper wit people might be wondering... hey what happen to the uncle who was mowing the compound ya... Wether he felt sorry...guilty...

You know what...

Because he was too engrossed with his task, and the sound of the mower was very loud, he didn't notice what had happenned just a few yards away.

And the greatest thing about this part of the detail is....

My beautiful Mak.

Her heart is so pure that she never ever told the uncle of what had happend.... that he could be the cause of me loosing one of my eyesight...

Just because she didn't want the uncle to feel guilty or blaming himself...


Monday, July 21, 2008

MAK & her powerful WORDS.


MAK = MOTHER. That's how I called her.

I was 4. Weird as it sounds, I can actually remember certain events that happened during that very young age. The incident I was about to tell you took place just after I celebrated my 4th birthday in our village's kindergarden that I went to, and then it was teatime.

Mak was grating coconut in the kitchen (the old fashion Malay traditional thing-a-magicky ... I am sure some of y'all might still recall it). At that very same time, the uncle next door, did us a neighbourly favour mowing our compound. It was a huge green compound we had back then. He used the motorised mower machine that was still new & oh-so-sophisticated at the time.

We were amazed by it. Abang & I. Abang was standing at dead centre of our kitchen door, watching the uncle in action. I wanted to join too, what abang was doing, I also wanna do, was always like that. As I was peering my head over the door jamb, Mak called out, "don't stand at the door, pebbles might flew to hit you..."(jangan berdiri kat pintu.... kena batu kang...) and just a split second after she finished her sentence... POW!!!!!!! A pebble came flying and hit me... just below my left eye. A few milimeters up and I could be blinded for life! I remembered putting my hands over the wound and was too shocked even to cry. Mak jumped from the grater, carried me, put me on her lap and start checking my wound. I don't remember anything much after that. What Mak had told me, the next morning half of my face became blue-black and Mak & Abah had to rush me to the hospital. The doctor then gave me some kind of shot right onto the wound.

There's much more incident similar to this after as I was growing up... and how I learnt to appreciate that very strong bond between us, that even just her words can affect me in so many big magical ways.

I already know that most of her quiet words was blessing & prayers for me (and abang ofcourse) .. even how bad a daughter I was to her sometimes... still I am wishing so much that she'd blessed me more, for I am forever a child who is still growing up.

If you look closely you still can see the scar under my left eye. I'll have it all my life I guess.. A special reminder of her words that never left me.

Really miss her. May her soul rest in peace, ameen.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

So i replied...


Anak-anak ku,
Cahaya mata ku,
Jantung hati ku,
Penawar duka ku...

Anak-anak ku,
Nafas ku,
Nyawa ku,
Degup nadi ku...

Anak-anak ku,
Setiap ingatan mu,
Setiap rindu mu,
Setiap doa mu,
Bekalan semangat buat ku.

Like i said earlier... u don't need to understand this to understand us...

I call this LOVE

Found this in my e-mail today.

A poem from my girl Dania. She's 9. And i think she composed it herself, maybe not, but u can bet it's the most beautiful thing i read ever.

*ibu kusayang
tempat ku bermanja
jasamu ku kenang
hingga akhir masa.
*ibu mendidik ku
dengan penuh mesra
jasamu berikan
kusanjung, ku puja
*ku berjanji setia
mengikut kata2
apa terjadi
tetap ku hadapi
mama ni untuk mama.........dania

Not all of u can understand it, but all of you certainly can understand us.


Monday, June 30, 2008

My MESIR lover... (maaaaaannnnn)


Well well well well well..... Didn't know I have one.....

I'm tellin y'all.. The big important word again..... P-H-E-N-O-M-E-N-A-L.

See the AED50 note? I got this from Centrepoint as I was shopping there last week... (what did I buy... ermmmm... oh it was not Centerpoint... it was DFC, bought 2 pairs of s-e-x-y-y-y-y shoes! With rhinestones. Totally meant for whoring... really. The shoes, not me. Ofcourse. But u know... who knows what I am capable of rite...) Ops where was I?

Ah yes the AED50 note.

It so happenned that I wanted to pay Grace lunch money with this note, then I saw the scribbling and asked Nadine to translate it for me (see above above). Yea-yea-yea uols might say by now 'yea-huh what so phenomenal about that???' Focus ok, focus... Y'all smart people are not loving me as much anymore.... tsk..

See the date? I put it in bold ok so it will be more obvious for those who still care. Got it? Rang any loud bells? Want me to spell it out loud?

It's my BIRTHDAY !!

Just a coincidence? Ah dawn't thaynk so...

Maaaaannn how PHENOMENAL was that huh ..... one phenomenal occurrence keep happening after another. (Altogether now... PHENOMENAL!!)

Ok that's it. I am not going to say the word again for the rest of the month.

What word?

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _.

Starts with a 'P'.

Saturday, June 28, 2008


Let me share something somewhat weird & phenomenal (give me chance to use big important words ok) that I am experiencing. I had actually been noticing it for quite sometime now. But let's just focus on the previous few days.

I went to Spinneys few nights ago, thought it might be too late already, so I checked my watch. It's 10.10pm. Then I bought milk, granola bars, cereals, tissue, ice cream - which totalled up aed50.50. Went home, watched a movie and dozed off on the sofa. When I woke up, checked my phone, the time showed 12.12am.

Then another night I went out with Kate. When we met at Mister Baker, checked my watch, it was 8.08pm. Then later we left to see Hazem at a bar in Satwa. The match between Turkey and Germany was on, I sms Ugur letting him know I am supporting Turkey... and a few seconds after he replied, Turkey scored, a guy named Ugur Boral made the goal. :O Checked my phone for the time when I was in the bar, it was 11.11pm! Hazem said hey your time is wrong, but that was not the case here!!!

The next morning, I was getting ready to go to the office,checked my watch again it was 8.08am. And the very same nite, in the taxi with Hazem & Kate, checked my phone, it was 11.11pm!

Y'all, these are the events that I remembered. There's more ofcourse that I can't recall in detail.

I'm tellin y'all... 8 out of 10 time-check, I will see doubles! Signs u think? Prophecies maybe (Yea I wish) Of what? Kinda mysteriously spooky if you think hard about it...

Hey any wise SIFU out there can help me out?


I wish i could change

I wish i could change

I wish i could stop sayin the same old things

I wish i could be what u want me to be

I wish i could stop being the same old me

I wish i could loose all of my blues

I wish i could stop putting my blues on you

I wish i could love like nobody love

I wish that my goods outwit my bads enough

....... Suddenly there's nothing i want more.......

(Robin Thicke)

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Still the hands, but reading.

What a productive week this had been. So glad it's Thursday again. Not so productive here in the blog because I was ignoring it for a whole week. It's ok I forgive myself.

Ok. So I met this girl during a get-together ... after being our chatty selves she claimed that she can read palm. I am not into this kind of B.S., but nevertheless, being a sport, I let her read mine. Hey a lot u can tell from just looking at hands actually ... I am not a pro, but just by studying one's hand, you can actually can tell things like your personality, length, depth (erm that's another story and  let us not get side-tracked here) ....

So this is what this palm-reader girl concluded about me...

CHEATER (damn), married twice, first marriage weak, second marriange strong. Still cheating tho' (what a bitch). Will come to a point in wealth where work is becoming unnecessary (lucky bitch). Too much worries, messy in the head but somehow always pull thru' hard times. Very strong, will of iron. Faced & will face a lot of challenge in life but won't easily break. Very caring to the love ones. Will travel far but will go home eventually.

Hmmmmmmm...... should I reveal if she got it correctly or not?

Anyway, a day after, I met up with Buck. And he was with his friend that I've never met before. So having a stranger sitting in front of me, I decided to try out my new found SKILLS onto him. Better to read a stranger's palm, because you might be bias to the person that you already know.

So this was my conclusion on him...

Married once, very very strong marriage... (he told me immediately that he got 7 kids)... 7 kids? Mannn how strong marriage is that!? NEVER CHEAT!! (what a man!) Never get rich enough to have to stop working (poor guy - I didn't reveal this to him though). Others were about the same, travelling, strength (although I am pretty sure that have some stronger 'kick-ass lines' than he has)

Soon after, when we were dropping him off - hey REVEALATIOOOONNNN!!!!!

"I have 2 wives" said the man who never cheat.

Proved my very first point I wrote above there .....


Thursday, June 19, 2008


I weighted myself lastnite... and was shocked. 62KG? Gila babi!! That's fat mannn! I got on and off the scale again & again, hoping the number would change but noooo it stays accurately (not) at 62kg. I left the scale alone for 1/2 hr or so, hoping that it would 'correct' itself (silly really) but again, the 62kg appears again. Mannn I was depressed! I need somemore of those ice cream! But no. I decided not to get panicked that easily. Calmed down and just went to bed like normal people... Normal slim people...

So this morning I asked for a second opinion. And third...

Ok that's it tonight I am buying a new scale!

Wednesday, June 18, 2008


Let's see... what shall I write.

Ok. This is for y'all in KL and whoever's wondering what have I been up to.
*Been up to no good.* Nahh. Me iz a gud gurl.

For the moment I am in Dubai, working here now on a permanent basis. Alone for now, my darling girls will be joining me soon in August. Yes, they will start their school here 4th Sept. Exciting you think? Well at least they are excited...

Honestly, I am a bit nervous. Trying to adapt is not the same for everyone...some fast, some slow, some steady, some can't take it. I know mine are gutsy girls but you never know. Hope they will be as strong adapting life here.

Next I am looking for a proper place. Not that I am living improperly now, it's just that I need our own place when they are here. Can't be living in this bachelorette's pad you see...

Yea... bachelorettes. That's what we are now. Well in my case that's a temporary condition. Do I like it... yea it's not bad, Kate (the other bachelorette) she's a load of fun. By the way, she's not around for the next week or so, busy bouncing her cute lil ass in Canada. So I am alone in the flat now. Early nights, late mornings. Not that she's keeping me up when she's around, but usually we always have something to do or bitch about or explore.... (too much info there ahem). Ops did I say 'bitch'? I mean 'talk'. Ah y'all smart people surely would figured that out...

Ok it's 11.30 pm. Need some naughty dreams. Nite y'all ..... Sambung esok.