Monday, December 15, 2008

Ugur + Rodie + 2 Hours In The Gardens Traffic

We left the office 5.30 as usual, and headed straight to the Gardens, and he would drop me at the Ibn Batuta Mall so that i can get a cab easier. This has been going on for two months now. And we are more relaxed with our languages now to each other since it's just the two of us in the car (and by saying that, meaning all the vulgarities flying all over the car interior u have to fumigate the car after we got out!!) It was always fun and funny.

But today it was MIND BLOW-ING.
**don't get excited over the word in CAPS could be of bizzilions other meanings - wink**

We started to talk about TV shows - well - he started it by singing 'Smelly Cat' and we laughed like crazy. And we spoke of the scenes and characters that we love and hate from 'Friends'. The difference between the 3 guys & the 3 chics when they were talking about Ross+Rachel's first kiss. Then we moved on to Seinfield, we both love Kramer... then we start reminiscing the younger years when there was 'Cheers'. He mentioned he was in the 'Cheers' bar when he was in the USA a few years back, and i told him i love it so much i even memorised the theme song by heart. He asked me to sing it and spontaneously turned off the radio...

Makin a way in a world today takes everything u got
Takin a break from all your worries surely would helped a lot
Wouldn't u like to get away?
Sometimes u wanna go
Where everybody knows your name
And they always glad u came
U wanna be where u can see
That troubles are all the same
U wanna be where everybody knows your name
U wanna go where people know
That people are all the same
U wanna go where everybody knows your name....

We even sang the last verse together. Had a little Ugur-Rodie moment there (don't kill me y'all!!!)

Then we went back to 'Friends' and we agreed that no matter how many times we watched it we still laughed the same way. And he said the other one that he love to follow was 'Sex & The City'. Oh i said... i thought guys HATE S.A.T.C, laughingly he said yes, that's why he followed it!

And... that was the point where Ugur should change his career to become a public speaking GURU (one with a very SEXAY Turkish accent). I am telling y'all... that man has some phenomenal (that word again) theories!

He told me that the only reason he's following the S.A.T.C is because of 'Big'. according to him, 'Big' should be the role model of all men, on how to deal with the female spiecies. 'Big' is not ruled by anyone, 'Big' came & went as he wished and got Carrie wrapped around his finger, playing her on a string. 'Big' put his woman in the place WHERE THEY SHOULD BE. 'Big' might be in love... but he doesn't give a f***.

Ok maybe some of you never watched the S.A.T.C. Ok move on to his next theory.

To him, when a guy is thinking he is smarter than the female sitting across him, he could be the biggest idiot in the world. Yep... IDIOT was his very word. Why.. u might ask..

Because, if any men should've known better, the female spiecies are the BEST at playing dumb. If a guy thinks that he is smarter and winning, that means that the girl actually manipulate him to think that he is smarter and winning .... so that  he would be totally oblivious when she took 'the driver's seat' ... therefore as a matter of fact-ly, she's actually the winning one!

And according to Ugur, the smartest girl ever - is the girl who knows how to make her man thinks that he is with THE IDEA and THE DECISION... when in fact THE IDEA and THE DECISION are all HERS!!!

Next, he said a guy should carry a pint of blood in his pocket at all times. Because?

When a guy is having a hard on, all the blood in his body went rushing to 'there' (he was actually gesturing towards his 'there'!! i almost passed out!!!) So there will be none left to function the brain. And therefore the man is the most useless creature at this point. A total wreck to mankind. Whatever his actions during this time is all controlled by a woman. He is merely a puppet to be played and abused. So, should the guy carry around a pint of blood in his pocket all the time, he could have immediate blood transfusion. Hence while having a hard-on, there's still be sufficient blood supply for him to function the brain!!!!


Although i still think he's a CHAUVINIST PIG. Big time...

Sunday, December 14, 2008

the philosopher

let me take a friend's smart ass quote and twist it around.

life is complicated as u make it.
life is a bloody drama as u make it.
life is a bitch as u make it.
life is worthless as u make it.

key word - u make it. your choice. your decision to jump. so don't blame the rest of the world that u tried and failed. blame yourself for choosing that path u took. take the downside of your own choice, your own make & your own decision like a MAN. face the consequences. have some f**king balls.

u choose to live a complicated life, hence failed, hey don't bitch about it. don't fret. don't bring the rest of the world down with u. stop bein a f**king whiner. shut-the-f**k-up.

simple huh ... simple my a**!!